Leaf of the spring;
Yellowed, yet hanging on;
The earth calling her;
The wind whispering in her ears;
She, clinging on to the tree!
There is nothing that the tree can do;
As if, he wants to water her;
Yet, he is empty;
She is thirsty, she is dying;
She can do nothing other than holding on!
She knows, the fall awaits;
The fall to be embraced by the earth;
Fluttered by the wind;
Perhaps, to be free;
Yet, she tries; just a little longer!
A gust of wind came her way;
She stayed firm;
She could feel the tree hanging on to her;
Maybe this is it; him wanting me;
And then, she fell; to the warmth of the earth, freed from the cold clutch!
In the Ocean of Nectar!
A drop of poison in the ocean of nectar;
And the animals died;
The ecosystem destroyed;
The air became poignant with rotten smell;
The nectar; lost its essence!
Amid the pungency around; nectar questioned itself;
Was I so incapable; incompetent to protect?
While the poison roared;
A roar of victory; victory in the destruction;
For that’s all they knew; each their way!
Nectar shrank to non-existence;
While poison grew to build an empire;
An empire of nothingness;
An empire of despair and debris;
While nectar was beaten; poison went on barraging!
The Venus & the Moon! 🌙
The Venus and the moon; yet again they come together. The Venus looked at the moon; she looked at the way he stared into the eyes of the earth; in silence, in awe, amid the cold breeze of summer with the splashing sound of the waves!
“Why don’t you just go over there and hug her?” Asked she.
The moon looked at her with a smile of sadness. “If I go there and hug her, she will be destroyed. I can’t possibly do that.”
“Isn’t love about destruction? It is that burning fire that sometimes burns the one, within who it burns don’t you think? For there is no love without the fire and there is no fire without the heat of destruction and debris!” Said the Venus.
“The fire that burns in me, it burns me every moment, a little more! But I can’t let it affect her; never!” Said the moon with a determination in his tone.
“I understand.” Said the Venus; while she looked around her.
There is no moon of my own for I burn for you; thought she. The ardent love for you never let me want my moon; while it destroys me everyday a little bit more with the heat of the sun without any shield of my own. But perhaps, this encounter with you, the temporary conversations keep me alive; how long I don’t know; but perhaps for today, it’s enough! She sighed.
The moon was in awe of the earth while Venus was in awe of the moon!
To Love; Having Lost!
Trust;
Perhaps the purest form of being;
In trust, there is no doubt;
There is no fear of loss;
No fear of abandonment;
There is no fear!
In trust, one belongs! Truly!
Loss;
Perhaps the most transforming experience;
Not just an experience;
It becomes a way of being;
Shedding parts; clinging on to memories;
Clinging on to a fear!
Having lost, the ability to trust ceases!
Love;
A thing of surrender;
To love, having lost;
An act of courage and bravery!
It’s a rebel, a war within;
Unhealed wounds, scarred yet trying!
With love; one tries to live!
There are constant wagering of wars, the wars of power, the wars of greed; that sacrifice people. But who speaks of the wars, that leave unseen wounds, sacrificing the lives of the living?
The Years Lived
Her eyes sparkling; in the twinkling light of the stars, looking at the vast horizon of the beach; she sat there. Her hands touching parts of the sand and parts of the unbinding universe.
He looked at her. The subtlety in her demeanor and the dazzle in her eyes told many stories of her persona. But he let her sit silently delving into her soul, thinking of things she wanted to think. Tears rolled down her eyes; the waves of the ocean splattering on the beach could only soothe her so much! He thought!
She was 24 she said. He thought of the twenty four summers she must have seen; the heat would have been different everytime. There would have been pain in some and pleasure in some. So many significance she must have experienced; somewhere the first love and somewhere the first heart break!
He thought of the springs, that would have touched her. Sometimes bringing her a touch of excitement of love, an erotic thought or a calming moment for the onset of summer. The autumn leaves falling, would they have been similar for her all these years or would they have been different; somewhere a little orange tinted maple leaves and in some others the leaves of some unknown wild plant in yellow tinges.
The morning dew on the green grass or rose petals; how would those twenty four winters must have been! And the rains; oh the rains; romantic and vibrant, at the same time with so much of chaos and dirt and mud; how would they have treated her? Would she be a person who got agitated with the mud or danced to the tune of the raindrops; enjoying the splashes while getting drenched! He wondered!
She looked at the beach; getting lost in its splendid vastness. She thought of his words; “had my daughter been alive, she would have been of your age today! We lost her when she was young, she jumped off the cliff, she thought we wouldn’t love her if she didn’t perform the way we expected of her! But the only thing that ever mattered to us was her to be here, to be with us, to be alive!”
That made her to take a pause and re-think her decision. Perhaps, he was right. Perhaps, her life mattered to people beyond her usefulness. But did it really?
She thought again! Why is it that in front of death, life is so important? But in life, there is a different level of significance to everything except life itself?
The Clouded Sun!
I’m strong, I won’t succumb;
This fog can never hide my shine;
Cried the sun, shrugging off!
His shine dimmed yet not gone;
His strength fighting its way out;
He held the ground!
There came the cloud;
In her tender tone;
“Not always you need to be strong!
Come here, I’ll hide you!
Shed those tears, you’ll come out stronger;
Not always you need to stand!”
There looked the sun!
In his soul, he wanted to burst;
In his heart, he wanted to surrender;
But survival instinct of strength kicked in;
He looked at her; trying to stand still!
His aura, confused; not ready to trust!
Came the cloud yet again!
She hid him behind her big heart;
He held still; for once;
There was strength in the vulnerability;
He didn’t succumb, yet regained his strength;
The sun came back; tearing the fog apart!
Agony of Love!
Created to spread sparkles;
Ended up breaking hearts, bringing tears!
In the colourful rainbow bliss;
Expected to bring in northern lights!
I ended up bringing a tsunami!
I’m love!
I was created to make lives joyous!
Where did I go wrong?
Spreading trauma, irrecoverable;
Where did the splashes of colour go?
Is it me?
They associate hormones with me;
And electric currents with my sparks!
But, they never let me just be me perhaps?
What would I have done otherwise?
Squeezed between consequences & norms!
Pressured under the heat of expectations;
My warmth is gone!
There is nothing but coldness;
It makes me shiver; sending chills down my spine!
Is that all?
Boundaries; pressure; expectations!
The pouncing demand of survival;
In the instincts of life, living is lost!
Perhaps, that’s all there is; all the love & cheer!
The Moon! 🌙
I had a choice, always!
I could have taken the warmth of other stars!
But the sun!
He allured me!
His rays were not warm enough; for me!
Even though he had the power to burn the universe;
He never burnt for me; perhaps!
Or perhaps, he burnt;
Only to radiate the heat to others!
I don’t know.
I don’t mind!
His cold beams are enough for me!
I chose them!
Today, and perhaps in all the times to come; i will!
I’m beautiful, they keep staring!
But alone; they keep pondering!
The universe looks at me; in love!
For I’m loved or I love better; I don’t know!
It’s a choice for them;
But perhaps the only one I will ever knew;
The choice, I would make a thousand times over!
For the moon never stops to fascinate me!
Waiting!!
Waiting;
A symbol of trust;
A hope;
An expectation of tomorrow; the only companion of solitude!
Waiting;
is permanent;
is soulful;
Counting stars, looking at the horizon, remembering memories!
Waiting;
Fills the void in the heart;
Fills the dark room with light;
The last remnants when everything else is gone but you are in denial!
Waiting,
Makes the evening tea a thought more than an activity;
Creates memories of desires, of wishes, of expectations, of the future;
It’s the memories of the future!
Strong Woman!
She’s a strong woman;
Applauded for her strength;
Celebrated for her grit!
Worshipped for her splendid personality!
The splatters of blood of her heart;
Scattered was her soul;
In the disguise of all the brevity;
Gasped her vulnerability!
There was a mask behind the masks;
Always wet, sometimes from blood, sometimes from water;
Behind the strength;
Crumbled her soul and heart!
Another round of applause!
Another bottle of champagne popping;
Splatters of her blood turned sedative;
Once again, she stood strong; for she never knew any other way to be!
Scribbled_Mindspace 